Today is a good day

💋💋feeling sexy

I am in love again!!!

I am officially the coolest boobless person in the world !!!!!  Working hard on this app and yes my dear friends i am staying positive and fighting for my marriage.  Stay tuned for my survey questions....

My body

I feel very sad that in my time when my body was #amazing I didn't even use it. I remember a patient at d nursing home advising me to put my looks to good use- u will not look like this forever😕. I now understand ....

In the beginning..

 

I believe that God works for the good of those He loves. He loves us, and as His child I fear no evil. I was born in Rome, Italy. The first daughter of six, to Nigerian parents in search of a better life. I have always known I was special. “God loves me!!!” I would tell myself with a smile. In my time with God I have always found an answer. Around the age of 10-11, I remember running towards a very bright light that led me to the balcony of our flat in Rome. I saw the Virgin Mary with baby Jesus making her way to heaven. Her calming smile and peaceful spirit reassured me that someday we will meet again. Ever since then, I have had this connection to God. He wants me to see Him in everything I do. Everything in this world has been created for our usage. With this philosophy I have lived my daily life.

 At the age of thirty two I was diagnosed with breast cancer. My 14 month old son found the lump on my right breast. A loud voice said to me “Its cancer”. How could it be?  Cancer? I am only thirty two?  I just got married? My son? …Soon after the finding I scheduled a total of six diagnostic tests that confirmed my fear. At this point I questioned my mantra in life. Does God really work for the good of those He loves?

 Death I did not fear. I feared for my son, unsure if my angel will remember his mother. Two months later I was scheduled for a double mastectomy, followed by several surgical revisions and chemotherapy every week. My spirit struggled to remain positive and our finances suffered as a result of my absence. I worried constantly as to how my family will survive. I began to search for nursing positions; to no avail. I was concerned about losing my insurance, our shelter, food and our bare necessities. At this time my mother kept reminding me to pray and to read my Bible. I did not want to talk to God. The God that gave me cancer. I refused to see the light in my tragedy.  

As time went on, my faith in God grew again. Reading calms the spirit; and when the world is silent His words sing a beautiful song. In the morning, I would meditate on His Word and envision myself flying like a bird around the world. As I flew, I would state my demands to the world. For instance: “Today, I open myself up to receive money or new opportunities or happiness or good health etc.” A mature philosophy in life emerged: God works for the good of those He loves. And as His children we are not immune to pain and sufferings. We have the benefit of His shelter and when we ask for help we will receive it.  My co-workers donated over 300 hours of paid time off to enable me to stay home and receive insurance. My parents took care of our son and enrolled him in a private school in California. My husband received $20,000 from his pension plan in South Africa. As a result our finances remained somewhat under control. In my dreams I still see the 10 year old me running towards the light on my balcony, and it’s nice to know that there will always be that light to guide me through. 

Is God talking to me?

And so it is....

Hello world ,

                    Its official i have a blog. Strange but i wish i started sooner......Not much to say at this time , just a little scared!!! My friends sister is dead , 34 , my age really ......i have to be strong and remain positive for Nathan and for myself. I watched my son play this morning, so innocent....he doesn't know that evil exist . The concept of need and pain is centered on food ,shelter and love. I love his innocence. I remember does days, when what mattered was my new toys, being popular or what i would wear next. Today i look at my bank account more than i read a newspaper....who am i kidding i read the news online but you get my point. What really happens when you die?You cease being . Dark emptiness........i do not want that. I want to live!!!!!!!! I sometimes wish i knew this sooner. I would have gone crazy!!!!!! or may be not..... May the youth enjoy its youth. I am just 34 now.....why do i feel so old?

Good night friends until tomorrow